Timothy Brehmer: The cheating police officer who killed his lover
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Timothy Brehmer was, by all appearances, a family man and respected Dorset police officer. But in May 2020, his carefully constructed facade unravelled. It culminated in the death of Claire Parry, a married nurse and mother of two.
At Crime+Investigation, we’ve examined many cases where tangled relationships escalate to devastating violence. This is another heart-wrenching example.
The crime
On 9th May 2020, Claire Parry met Timothy Brehmer in the car park of the Horns Inn pub in West Parley. She was married but had been engaged in a decade-long affair with Brehmer. Claire, growing increasingly frustrated with his broken promises, decided to take control.
Inside Brehmer’s car, Claire took his phone and sent a damning text message to his wife: 'I am cheating on you'.
The confrontation escalated. According to Brehmer, he panicked and what was later described as a 'kerfuffle' in court ensued. Claire suffered severe neck compression which left her unconscious. Brehmer claimed his arm 'must have slipped in all the melee'.
Claire was rushed to the hospital but succumbed to her injuries. It’s hard not to draw comparisons to the death of Sarah Everard, who was killed by police officer, Wayne Couzens in 2021.
The trial
Brehmer admitted to killing Claire but denied murder. His defence argued that her death was an accident, an unintended consequence of a panicked attempt to retrieve his phone. The prosecution painted a very different picture. They portrayed Brehmer as a manipulative and controlling individual, determined to silence Claire to protect his secrets.
Brehmer was acquitted of murder by a jury at Salisbury Crown Court, but convicted for manslaughter and sentenced by Mr Justice Jacobs.
'I am sure that you did deliberately take Claire Parry by the neck, applying significant force with your forearm or the crook of your elbow for a period of time while she struggled against you thereby causing the severe neck injuries which the pathologist described,' said the judge, when sentencing Brehmer to 10 years in prison.
The verdict sparked debate: was justice served, or did the legal system fail to account for the severity of Brehmer’s actions?
The domestic violence conversation
The Timothy Brehmer case isn’t just a story of an affair gone wrong. It reflects the pervasive issue of domestic violence and coercive control. Brehmer was acquitted of murder, yet the circumstances surrounding Claire Parry’s death underscore broader societal patterns of male violence against women, manipulation and systemic failure to hold perpetrators fully accountable.
During the trial, the judge acknowledged that the violence inflicted on Claire was deliberate. This set the record straight against Brehmer’s claim that her death was accidental. Shaista Aziz, from the domestic abuse charity Solace Women’s Aid, welcomed this clarity.
'You can’t accidentally break someone’s neck,' she said. 'It’s important the record was set straight there.'
Shaista also criticised the judge’s framing of Brehmer’s actions as a 'loss of self-control'. For her and her peers, this type of language often serves to justify violence against women. Brehmer’s narrative that the violence 'just happened' was emblematic of excuses frequently made by perpetrators of abuse.
A pattern of coercion and control
Brehmer’s relationship with Claire Parry exhibited many hallmarks of coercive and controlling behaviour. As noted by the Centre for Women’s Justice, his actions, described as 'grooming' techniques, reflected a pattern where emotional manipulation and psychological control were used to dominate Claire and maintain his double life.
This dynamic is not unique. Coercive control often precedes physical violence in abusive relationships. The goal? To create an environment where the victim feels trapped and powerless. Karen Ingala Smith, of the charity NIA, highlighted the broader implications:
'The criminal justice system in this country is failing women. Timothy Brehmer’s time in jail will be significantly shorter than his relationship with Claire Parry. It will also be significantly shorter than the duration of the pain of those who loved her.'
Double standards in the justice system
Disparity in how the justice system treats male and female perpetrators of violence was also hurled into the spotlight during and after the Timothy Brehmer trial. The Centre for Women’s Justice stressed the fact that women who kill abusive partners often receive life sentences for murder, even when their actions stem from fear and self-defence. Unsurprisingly, Brehmer’s decade-long sentence for manslaughter raised questions about systemic biases.
By framing Claire’s death within the broader context of domestic violence, her story becomes part of a larger and more urgent conversation, with the ultimate goal to better protect women and hold perpetrators to account.
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